Thursday, September 23, 2021

A Review of That Castlevania Show

While most of Netflix's original content is garbage, I actually enjoyed the Castlevania anime overall.  And yes, I totally have Netflix and did not go to an alternate site to watch the series and to do so would be totally immoral, theft, and criminal.  I can't believe you would suggest I do such a thing.

In any case, the anime is based on the popular long-running video game series from Konami and usually found on Nintendo systems, which is why I can't find any of the damn games for my PC.  At least none of the good ones.

It tells the story of Dracula and how his wife is cruelly murdered by the church when they find her practicing science, granted to her by her vampire husband.  Because her being in league with the world's most powerful and dangerous being isn't a cause for concern amongst those faithful, ignorant Christians.

The show was largely written by Warren Ellis, a man who is a devoted secular humanist, so of course you have the obligatory Christian bashing and weird ideas about God, Jesus, and faith in general.  Seriously, check out his photo.  He is literally a living example of the fedora meme.

The show ran for four seasons, although the first season could be called the introductory session to the second season, which was the true first season.

And here's a quick overview of the good, the bad, and the ugly aspects of the show:

The Good

Despite his anti-Christian, fedora-tipping views, Warren Ellis largely did a great job fleshing out the characters and more or less writing a coherent plot.  It's a solid story from start to finish with only a few major plot holes that I could identify.

The show focuses mostly on the adventures of three main characters: Trevor Belmont, Sypha Belnades, and Alucard, Dracula's son.  Each of them have their own unique fighting styles and are very adept at what they do.  Trevor, who could have been just another bumbling brute with a whip, is actually surprising knowledgeable and empathetic throughout the series.  He just tends to put on a gruff façade in order to keep people away from him.  And who can blame him, seeing as how his family is renown for killing demons and vampires.  It's actually an annoying legacy to deal with from time to time.

Alucard is well done as a lonely character, unable to exist in both the human or vampire worlds.  He has no desire to conquer or prey on humans but he also has trouble relating to people.  His character arc gradually overcomes this as the series progressed.

Sypha is probably the weakest of the characters.  While she is pretty solid in combat with her fire and ice magic, beyond that, she can be annoying as she is portrayed as having no real flaws to speak of.  This is even acknowledged by Trevor at the end of the third season.  So her character is largely dull with a pretty face.

As for the rest, they aren't boring at all.  Isaac has an amazing character arc, where you really start to root for him from the end of season three and onward.  Hector has an interesting arc, especially his interactions with Lenore.

The ideas that the show explores are interesting as well.  The idea that vampires conquer sections of the world, ruling in secret, and then develop advanced technology.  The fact that they are stuck in their ways and tend to dislike change.

The nature of alchemy is also explored, especially in the final season.  This is something that is done well with Saint Germain, a man who is very dangerous, but comes across as cowardly and foolish.

And the battle scenes are a lot fun to watch.  It's a lot of fun to see the various characters use their powers in interesting and unique ways.

The voice acting is solid as well and features a lot of well-known actors.

The Bad

Since Warren Ellis is a secular humanist, he seems to be injecting a lot of his stupid philosophies about God, Hell, and everything else in the story.  Fortunately, it doesn't get too preachy, but it does annoy me at times.  From Sypha's explanation about Jesus to the Church burning random women because SCIENCE!! to Trevor's incredibly stupid explanation of why crosses affect vampires, there's enough stupid nonsense to sort through.

There is some Woke shit slipped in for good measure.  Alucard is bisexual, though this isn't played up too much until the end of season three (more on that later).  There's a couple of vampires whose only character trait is that they are lesbian lovers.  Yes, one is a warrior and the other is an administrator, but beyond that, the only thing that makes them stand out is that they like to munch each other's carpets.

And then there is the random throw-away line where a sheriff of a local village is also bisexual when she's talking with Alucard and mentions how she seduced a married man and nearly got killed by his wife for it.

Then we have women in prominent positions of military leadership, which would never have happened during the era this takes place.  The only reason that Sypha is good at combat is because she can very quickly summon fire and ice to mess you up real quick.  And while this isn't much of a problem early on, in the last season we have the "warrior woman" trope rearing its ugly head.  It's stupid and dumb and only done because feminism means men like Warren Ellis can get laid without having to actually put real effort into thinking or lifting weights.

The Ugly

There is some really bad ugly in this show and unfortunately, it's really bad.  In the end of season three, when Trevor and Sypha are fighting the big bad of that season (some powerful demon trying to bring Dracula back), the action scenes are cut between other scenes.

Sex scenes.

And not just normal sex scenes, though there is one between Hector and Lenore that's fine.  But the one scene I'm referring to is one that involves Alucard in a two-man, brother-sister threesome.  I would say that Alucard enthusiastically engages with them, but really he just lays there while the brother does sodomy to him and the sister kisses him.  I mean, it's practically a rape scene.

There is a point at the end where the brother and sister entrap him in an attempt to steal his father's castle, but that could have been done without the sodomy beforehand.  Just trapping him in bed while he was sleeping would have been fine.  But no, they had to have their incestuous, two-man threesome.  Because that's all people do these days, right?

And again, this wouldn't have been too bad except that it was spliced in-between some really fun action scenes.  So my blood gets pumping with Trevor whipping the shit out of demons, then there's a cut to Alucard playing catch.

Conclusion

Despite that one section, I did enjoy the series overall.  Good storytelling and solid action, for the most part.  I'm guess, though, that the ugly part wasn't what was originally envisioned and some loser at Netflix demanded a brother-sister, two-man threesome scene edited together so you couldn't easily skip over it.  Because sodomites are like that.

But if you can get past that, you might enjoy the show overall.